Wednesday, August 27, 2008

035: The Villains Assemble

Continued from 034: The Heroes Gather
It had begun not too long ago, after the rescue of Player One and Shrugs. The Red Scare, after regaining consciousness, had become quite angry since he was looking at the dismantling of his plan, looking at what had become of his life. He was nearly forgotten, able to be stopped by a pitiful green creature, able to be tricked by some powerless fool.

This was not to the Red Scare's liking. Not one bit.

He looked at the computer Player Two had used to send his message, and nodded. Now he had their location, and he had a virtual army to command. However, it was still not complete. This was to be his supreme vengeance, perhaps his final attack on a world which continued to reject him. There were others like him, this he knew. He opened the files on the computer and began to read the entries of the super-criminal inmates:

"Hydrox. Formerly petty burglar Burt Easton, turned into a creature comprised entirely of water. Prefers a dragon-like form. Enemy of the New Paragons."

"Doctor Greenthumb. Formerly a respected scientist until he turned himself into a man/plant hybrid. Enemy of the New Paragons."

"America's Fastest Growing Criminal. Accident imbued him with the power to grow and shrink."

"Bootman. He wears a single over-sized boot which grants him indestructibility and some measure of control over his personal gravity."

"The Master Trawler. Pathological liar and notorious pirate."

"The Ohioan. Former Fifty Statesman with the powers of flight, empathy, and perfect balance."

"The Texan. Former Fifty Statesman with the same powers as America's Fastest Growing Criminal."

"The Child Wrangler, a cowboy-themed villain who kidnaps children and warps their minds."

"Watt. William Hewlitt. Powers of electricity."

"Wiper. He performs mind-wipes."

"Bad Higgins?"

Red Scare scoffed. Charlatans, each and every one. Amateur criminals in the truest sense of the word. The fact that they had been put into an asylum proved that. There were so few from the old days left, though. So very few. There was one, however, who was still going strong, and perhaps through him the vengeance of the Red Scare could be complete. He went to a safe in the wall and opened it, pulling out a dusty old walky-talky. He clicked it on and waited several minutes, until a voice on the other end demanded to know who it was.

The Red Scare smiled. "Doctor Aquarius, this is the Red Scare. I request your assistance against a league of heroes we have not seen in some time."

On the other end, Doctor Aquarius stared dumbfounded at the walky-talky. "All reports said you were dead, Red Scare."

"You know as well as I do that the only way you can be sure someone is dead is to grind their body to dust and make a pact with the Devil to ensure their immortal soul remains trapped in the afterlife."

"Well said. I know of some young miscreants who can help us, all over the state of Ohio."


"Surprisingly, it has turned into some sort of hotbed for villainy. I believe it has something to do with a dimensional rift situated here, or perhaps mere coincidence. It just so happens that I am also mentoring a group. I lead them, though I let them think they lead themselves. I have managed to secure three Gemini Twin Troopers to aid me."

"Excellent. I shall send you an address over the Internet. This shall be glorious, and perhaps we can deal with all these pretenders in one fell swoop."

The walky-talky clicked off, and Doctor Aquarius stared off into the distance of middle Ohio. Filled with corn and farmlands, and unspeakable evil. Granted, the unspeakable evil was mostly centralized in Athens, where a young man had taken it upon himself to lead a Fifth Reich and somehow secured the aid of Hitler himself, turned into a cyborg, and a giant Nazi mech. The rest of Ohio was little better. To the north, a roving gang calling the Crazy Azz Crocker Park Bicycle Pozze menaced the customers of a shopping center. Lycanthropes roamed the village of Linndale. Sandusky had its sinister sisterhood. Aquarius himself had taken up residence in Tiffin, and had secured himself a spot in a group of ne'er-do-wells there: the Infarious Eleven.

In addition to Doctor Aquarius himself and the three Gemini Twin Troopers, there was the figurehead leader El Presidente, a deluded young man who dreamt of power. The sinister ventriloquist Ernie Indiana utilized his rod puppet Ramses Bert in some sort of criminal endeavor. There was also the Armani Yeti, strong and fierce and on loan from the mafia. Ah, and the Pianoman who could memorize minds with his music. He realized that the team did not have eleven people in it, but paid it no heed. They would have to do.


Some time later, Doctor Aquarius and the Red Scare met with their various super-villains outside of South Carolina, ready to ambush the heroes who no doubt waited there.

"We were followed," said Doctor Aquarius.

"By whom?" replied the Red Scare.

"Hey everyone! I'm Chuckles Fairbanks, the Clown Pimp of Crime!" said a clown who had followed them.

They ignored him, and continued speaking. "Did anyone competent follow you?"

"I did," said a disembodied voice which solidified itself into the demon Purga.

"Who are you?" said the Red Scare.

"We seek the same end," said Purga, "I come to offer my assistance. In addition to your mutants and psychopaths, I can lend the aid of demons, vampires, and all matter of evil creature. In fact, it would bring me great pleasure to do so. I bring those wronged by fate and one who now calls himself Mikep, a small green creature-"

"We accept your aid, Purga," said the Red Scare, fire in his eyes.

"I shall bring the Magical Asexual Monkey Person, ruler of thousands of chimps. Doctor Degenerate, once brilliant but a literal former shell of himself. Dox, shapeshifter. Squibbons Johnson, a bizarre combination of undead squid and machine. Also, the mentioned demons and whatnot."

"We meet again," said another voice, stilted, and it manifested itself into a computer wearing an elf hat.

"One of yours, demon?" asked Doctor Aquarius.

"That is Lsadfsagi, whose powers are great. He is filled with malicious whimsy, however, so beware," said Purga.

He clicked his mouse, and a legion of pyramids appeared, at their head one with a goatee and another who was tiny. He then vanished.


"INDEED!" said the goateed Pyramid, "We shall aid you in your evil quest! If you are doing an evil quest."

"All right. I think this will do. Is everyone ready?" said the Red Scare, turning to the legions of villains that had been assembled and finding them to his liking. Watt flew from the ranks and clashed in the distance, returning soon after. "What was that?"

"Scouting. We allowed to kill them?" said Watt, engulfed in electricity.

"I don't see why not."

In the distance, the nursing home exploded.

"We can consider that to be our signal. Attack!" shouted the Red Scare, leading the legions.

Doctor Aquarius sighed, and turned to Purga. "I just wish my comrades from Zodiac were here."

Purga smiled, leaving it behind like the Cheshire Cat, and said, "That can be arranged."

To be continued in 036: The Battle Erupts

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